Wednesday, May 27, 2009

My Birthday

Its coming up in about a month. I'm going to be 35. I've been practicing saying it for about 8 months now, as in someone asks how old I am and I say " almost 35". I pretty much skipped 34 altogether.
I decided that this year, I wanted to have a huge party. I haven't had any kind of birthday thing since I was 16. In years past, I've mostly spent my birthdays drinking girly drinks out of ceramic pandas in Vegas. But Its really effing hot there in July and I hate flying and traveling and packing and dealing with people.
The most important aspect of my dream party was getting my husbands band to play. They hardly ever play locally and most of my friends/family have never gotten to see how effing great they are.
Finding an appropriate venue was also an issue. Someplace that you can have booze and a band thats not already booked for a wedding on a summer weekend.
And then I realized the best place to have a party is right down the street from my house!

This is pee wee golf...they use the purple dinosaur as a measuring device when it floods here...yes it really does get that high.

Totally beside myself with excitement in planning my zombie cake and ordering a corsage and making a dress to wear. Its going to be awesome!

Monday, May 25, 2009

Nikki and other stuff I did this weekend.

So First I made Nikki for a trade that I'm doing...I was going to name her Ange, but by the time I was done, she was totally a Nikki.

Yes, she has exposed brains. I totally love her and want to keep her.
Saturday night my friend was competing in a drag contest (the cross dressing kind, not the car kind, that would have been more fun) I did not want to go. Paul did not want to go. Drag queens scare me more than clowns do. Or zombies. Or anything really. But she peer pressured me into going and Paul took pity on me and didn't make me go by myself.
The premise was first you come out as your true gender (when she was up there, they called her a bio-girl, a phrase that amused me for the rest of the night) and answer some questions, then you get made up into the opposite gender, answer some more questions and perform a lip sync. It sounded totally horrifying to me. But I agreed to go, begrudgingly, with a lot of "well if you were REALLY my friend..."
So the thing started at 9pm...I had been working on Nikki all day and at 6, I figured I had time to take a nap. She calls at 6:30, all frantic wanting to borrow some of Pauls punk rock clothes because she had changed her song to the Violent Femmes and needed a new boy look. She also needed her makeup done. I hadn't taken a shower or eaten dinner yet, but I agreed to be at her house in an hour. In my haste, I forgot my real camera, and the pictures I took totally suck. But here they are anyway.

Me and Shannon and Me and Paul...yes, that is a gigantic magnolia attached to my head.

If You can't tell
Its a gigantic man wearing a silver tutu and Kiss boots.

She didn't win...although she should have...she was totally the best.

This is her from the back...she had a sweet faux hawk as a dude. I think I should be able to skip it next year.

Super Awesome Maneki Neko Giveaway!

I so love my team mates at the Dark Side. So much so that I'm willing to share this awesome contest that StaticWhite is having on her blog! All you have to do is visit her shop on Etsy and leave a comment here about what you would like to see more of. Her Maneki Nekos are freaking awesome and I just so happen to have a photo of me rocking one.

I love Lucky cats is a picture of my collection.

I have a problem evil sister keeps buying me ones that are good for fertility. Yikes!

Friday, May 22, 2009

House Hunting

So Paul and I are thinking about buying a house. He found this one online. Its huge...6 bedrooms, attic, screened porch off master, blah, blah, blah. Its also really old and really creepy. The bad news is its about 25 minutes from our house now...this would turn my 30 minute commute to work to about an hour. I know, no big deal for normal people, but I get off at effed up hours of the night and the idea of driving an hour to get home at 2 am, sounds really sucktacular. And I hate effing driving.

This week we are on a mini vacation, so yesterday we drove out to see it. I've never been to this town. It's a weird place. I wish I had taken more pictures but I was afraid of getting mobbed by the locals.
Pizza night might make me go to church...these kids were having this conversation:
Boy #1 to Boy#2

"so then...I kicked him in the BALLS! And I was going to give him a swirly...."
Pre-teens are the same wherever you go I guess...

The general store is your one stop shopping can buy a saddle and rent a VHS in the same corner. I felt like I had died and come back to 1988.
Gigantic chunk of corned beef...Paul said "You're like a detective" . I was trying to get as many covert pictures as I could.

The house was no more than 20 feet from the general store. A note on the door directed real estate agents to the back door because the front door was "swollen shut again"

The back door...I checked the knob to see if it was locked. It was. I was totally surprised. Paul said "wow, I've never seen you try to break in a place before." I guess he doesn't remember the first house we bought. This window was open/broken anyway so I could have climbed in if I wasn't so concerned about dead spiders and what not.

Front of the house...kept waiting for "REDRUM" to appear in the mysteriously frosted window.
So we didn't get inside yet...I'm not sure if we'll go back.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Bugs at work

For some reason, we always do this when someone finds a spider or other strange insect. This is a clean specimen jar (no pee) and the spider was released back into the wild. He did hang out with us for a few hours and was the object of much scrutiny. He had gnarly long fangs that I thought were legs at first .

-- Post From My iPhone

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Bloodbath Zombie Diorama

Finally finished and dry! Paul thinks she needs nipples...I just feel weird about it...I don't know why...I guess I just don't feel like zombies need to be anatomically correct. It took me months to get this diorama done. I had the bathtub out and the barbies face painted forever. Just staring at me all sad and what not. So I tried a new thing for the blood in the tub. Its the stuff that you pour into vases for fake flowers to simulate water. I added red food coloring and it came out really coagulated and gross looking, not clear red like I was expecting but more like real blood. Everyone that I've shown it to has had the same reaction "eww, thats really gross" or when I show my co-workers "you're so weird". Thats pretty much the emotion I was looking to invoke so I guess I'm pleased with the results.

I've been shopping

So I've been coveting these things from my fellow darkside team member StaticWhite 's shop for days. When she had a sale last weekend, I couldn't resist! I got a fabulous reversible diva capelet, a zombie tote bag (with eyeball tissue cozy), and a darling little batling! Because she is totally awesome, she also sent me some buttons and a scrap bat mirror! If you haven't checked out this shop...get your ass over there right now! Not only is she fabulous, but she lives in my second home town and has an amazing meticulousness about her work. It's too stunning! You must see it in person. Everything is either stitched by hand or done on a cranky old machine. I love her! And you will too! I promise!

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Zombie Killer leg Pendant featured!

My etsy dark side teammate the delightful Dreadfuldesigns was kind enough to feature my new Zombie Killer leg pendant in her blog...check it out...she always has great finds...and obviously good taste.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

At work

Totally annoyed that people don't call or show up for work. WTF ? Here is a picture of edamame I took.

-- Post From My iPhone

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Holy Crap I Got some stuff done this weekend!

Okay, I took a break from my iphone to get a WHOLE bunch of stuff done for my shop! New Zombie Killer Pendants...legs! Cufflinks, tietacks, oh yeah and my new favorite My Pretty Zombie Doll Ever...Tiffanie! She's one of the prettiest, and the least bloody. I think my picture taking is improving so I should really go back and retake photos of my other zombies.
Back to real life and pee testing tomorrow. It was nice to get a break and get some stuff done...yay !

Sneak preview

I couldn't wait to share this new Zombie. I need to let her dry more before I can move her to a better location for photos. I've been working on her forever and she's finally done! This is the bathtime zombie diorama...I will be listing her next weekend so keep an eye out!

-- Post From My iPhone

Saturday, May 9, 2009

I got a new toy

Paul said if I got an iPhone he would set of all up for me. I've barely let him touch it. It's like I imagine crack would be...

-- Post From My iPhone

Monday, May 4, 2009

I've been bad about blogging lately. For some reason, I feel like I need to post a photo on every blog I write. I haven't taken any good pictures so here is an awesome one of experimental bacon gravy that Paul made. Boy was it delicious!
Anyway...I've been slammed at work...tons and tons of pee and training 3 new kids has left me short tempered and edgy. I really need a day off (or 2) to get some crafting done. I did managed to hit both Beverley's and Joann's this weekend where I spent $60 and only got one tiny bag of crap. Thats pretty much what always happens. Paul refuses to go to the craft store with me unless its my birthday or valentines day. But this time my friend Shannon agreed to go with me. Because we live so far from town, everything always turns into a 5 hour trip. By the time we got back, all I wanted to do was take a nap. So much for Saturday.
Sunday was more productive. I made an ass load of hair flowers, two new large zombie killer pendants that I can't wait to list (omg, its a leg with a shoe...they creep me out so much more than the hands for some reason) and got the settings ready for my zombie killer cuff links and tie tacks (eta next weekend). It was my first time working with resin and it went surprisingly well. I bought the low odor kind and didn't really notice any smell at all.
Meanwhile, I have two sad half painted zombies staring at me. I keep telling them I will get to them. Maybe when I retire from pee.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Winner Announced!

All right, you've all been through enough. Come to think of it, so have I!

When I started this contest, I thought I would only get a couple of responses...but 12 people were willing to write Haiku for this!! How freaking awesome! And then, you guys have to all write good ones. I kept expecting to get a crappy one, but they all ruled. Who knew there was such a plethora of zombie haiku writing talent out there. I was stunned. Every time someone submitted a new one, I would decide that was my favorite. And then I read the next one and then THAT one would be my favorite.

So what can I do when all these haiku are my favorite and I can only have one winner?

Draw a number out of a box. And then make up runner up packages for everyone else who entered. So if you entered this contest email me your mailing address at and I will send you a little something from myself and probably a little something from my dark side team mates as well. Because you guys totally rule and I hope you had as much fun as I did, I think you're effin great!

so the lucky magic number is 12!
Congratulations RocketGirl!

And here is the winning haiku:

Jars of pee says she?

That causes limbs to fall off?

....Zombie pee thinks me!

so thanks all, for making my week so entertaining. Hugs!